I actually had time to post not once but twice tonight... This one is just a quick note.

I am so excited to say that we have our first male visitor to YACC. I was contacted by a young man named Devon's, brother tonight. We had a great chat and he will be bringing Devon out on Monday to give group a go. I hope he will find it to be what he needs, and that we can offer him support and encouragement with everything he is going through. It sounds like he really needs that right now. Hopefully us ladies won't scare him off, we can be a rowdy bunch! hee hee!

Went tanning tonight. Am trying to get my color back after being so sick. I did the stand up, which was really dump with my feet hurting the way they do... The things we do for beauty.

My boss emailed back and I will be on the schedule as of May 12th again. Wow. 6 weeks off work. I am actually slightly nervous about returning.

I am still in awe at the generosity we saw today. I continue to feel so great about being able to help out to make this trip a reality for some of our members, even if I am not able to help tons, even giving a little gives me this great sense of accomplishment. Though I find it funny, that after all these years of being very, very, stubborn at accepting assistance myself, I now am now the recipricant of the resistance.

One member in particular, who has a young family, and is unable to work due to treatment, is trying to refuse my help. I am stubborn and I will win in the end... I always do, but it is funny how it can be such a hard thing to swallow your pride and just say accept that there is help there for you. I know it all too well. My mother was the same way... She felt very strongly about accepting any form of "charity" as she would call it. It took a very long time to convince her that by her accepting the help, she was making it easier on everyone. It is something I had to come to terms with too, and can honestly say, I am not that great at it yet either... but hey!! I let Kristie drive us today.. So I guess I'm making progress! Ha ha.

I found an interesting Ezine....

So by not accepting the help that someone is offering we are depriving them of something. We are rebuffing their impulse to be generous, to be giving, and we are making sure that we are not allowing too much of a relationship to grow between us. We are protecting ourselves from the uncomfortable feelings of trust, neediness, being beholden, those feelings that intrinsic to being human but which may have created problems for us when we were younger. If we do accept help and are critical of how that help is given, it further shields us from developing a mutual relationship with the other person.
We are also depriving ourselves of the opportunity to soar when we insist on acting alone. There is a synergy that happens when people work together and come up with a solution that would have been impossible if each had acted alone.

I’m sure there are people in your life that you allow in, that you let help and nurture you. But I bet this only goes so far. I challenge you to just say “Yes, thank you!” the next time someone offers help. Live with the bit of discomfort and see if you can allow a different outcome.

I thought it was an interesting take on this. It was written by Martha Ruske, a marriage and family therapist in California and was actually written about recovering as an alcoholic, but it really does apply.

Our power was down for about 2 hours.. Luckily I was out with Boo, taking her to dance and tanning, so Chris suffered it out at home with the other two girls! It was on when I got home. No idea how it happened. Strange.

Well, I think I have yammered enough, off to bed!